Instill-ation Required

Morals are funny. They’re instilled (instill-ation required!) upon us by our parents, by our environment, by our friends. Instilled—funny—it’s as if we’re full of a fine wine, or a sour vinegar. The scary part is….some people act sour…their morals don’t come from any perceivable place (no place one can actually delineate. Is it because we’re the TV generation? Is it because the Internet has replaced face-to-face communication? Or is it because these people are just defective—flawed—EVIL?).

So, I say if there’s a way to instill morality into people—BEFORE they become evil—any way—even something like religion—do it! I’ll admit I don’t understand religion. Many people are totally devoted to a church. But I’m not. I’m not saying it’s not a good thing. There would be lots more crime in the world if there were no moral boundaries. So if you’re committed to a church. Even if you’re somewhat obsessive about it, I say go. Not “just say no” (it’s NOT really drugs, it’s JUST an obcession)…okay, then just go…gotta go, gotta go, gotta go go go. No, it’s NOT diarrhea (well, at least it’s NOT to some people). “If it makes you happy”….as that song says…”it can’t be that bad” (unless it’s drugs, alcohol, sexual addiction, murder, hate, Barney—don’t get me started!)….well you get my point, live by a set of moral standards that is appropriate….do unto others, before they do unto you…I mean, live by the golden shower, err…rule.

Okay, so I’m a blasphemer, I admit it. I’m just saying that everyone should just live a good moral life that they feel is appropriate. Chose a religion wisely, but ALSO chose friends wisely, as they are a barometer of who one is and what one stands for. “Stand tall, don’t you fall”….”Wouldn’t you give your hand to a friend”…”He ain’t heavy, he’s my brother”….all these songs have the same idea….be good to your friends….be good to other people…don’t cheat (and get caught)….don’t lie (and get caught)…don’t steal (and be filmed for the New Orleans nine-o’clock news)….don’t murder (unless you’re a wealthy black football star)….don’t have sex with children (unless you’re a wealthy black singer whose face is melting…”I’m melting, melting!”)… and don’t do unto others what you wouldn’t want done unto you (okay, so raping and pillaging sounds like fun with some people—but maybe THEY don’t think so!).

Just because I’m a blasphemer doesn’t mean I don’t have morals—I’d never rape and pillage anyone who didn’t want to be raped and pillaged! I would never commit murder (not because the Bible tells me not to—but because I believe EVERY person has a right to life, liberty and the pursuit of GETTINGLAID—well, happiness in any form that doesn’t hurt people, unless of course they want to be hurt, and then it’s just a sicko deviant behavior that should be treated by a psychiatrist! And some psychiatrists don’t have morals either—sleeping with patients that need their help—confusing these poor vulnerable (psychotic) people (masochists) who need a psychiatrist’s (head shrinker’s) advice (control) when they are at their lowest point (nuts). What does this make THESE bad, bad psychiatrists? Rapists? Pillagers? Thieves? Satan worshipers? Repressed assholes? Immoral, at least. Hopefully, monetarily liable at best.

But unlike these psychiatrists, I DO have morals—even though I don’t believe in a set religious doctrine, go to church, have any altruistic bones in my body, have any friends who have NOT been in prison for one reason or another, and love to watch the movie about the crazy male psychiatrist who is sexually attracted to a female patient, causing a rift in his psychotic alternative sexual personality, so he has to kill this patient while dressed as a woman! (Dressed to Kill—watch it—OR die!)